i love taking this journey while at the same time going through the study "How People Change" on wednesday nights at my church. we have been learning about God's work of sanctification in our hearts as believers. gotta say, i was never taught this stuff growing up at my church back home. i was never taught about God's ongoing work in our lives to conform us more into His image. so, it's kind of like i am a little kid Christian, just trying to soak it all in! one thing we learned last night was that "we CAN change." the sin that so easily captivates our hearts and minds CAN be weeded out through Christ's finished work on the cross. He has died for our sinfulness. it has been conquered! He wants to work us from the inside out to change us. my whole life up until college, i tried the outside-in approach, only to fail time and time and time again. . .
all of this to say, we can learn to love like Christ has called us to love. no matter what circumstances we may face, we CAN truly love our spouses. if you've been following this journey, you understand that i don't use the term "love" lightly! love is a very loaded word!
feelings. our culture thrives on feelings. we watch a movie, and we start to wonder why our love life isn't as passionate as the couple on the television screen. we hear a song, and we wonder why our spouse doesn't always tell us that we are beautiful just the way we are. :) or why our love-life isn't always a teenage dream. we read a book, and wonder why our relationships aren't as romantic. why our men aren't like rhett butler. dissatisfaction galore! and it's all based on how we feel while we read, listen or watch the feelings-crazed entertainment. i mean, even on facebook, everyone has everything together, right? your friends all have perfect little marriages and perfect little families. everyone is always smiling in their facebook profile pictures. guess what? life isn't like entertainment. it isn't like the movies. don't let dissatisfaction in your spouse thrive in your heart. "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." choose to love, even when your lover isn't being lovely. life is TOO SHORT for bickering and wishing your spouse is someone he will never, ever be!
"Instead, it's time to lead your heart to once again delight in your mate. Enjoy your spouse. Take her hand and seek her companionship. Desire his conversation. Remember why you fell in love with her personality. Accept this person--quirks and all--and welcome him or her back into your heart" (Love Dare, 67).
i read Song of Solomon a few months back, and very much loved it! the title of my blog comes from this beautiful book. it really is just beautiful. it opened my eyes to what taking true delight in my husband should look like. i'd really encourage you to read this poetic book.
"Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. He has brought me to his banquet hall, and his banner over me is love." Song of Solomon 2:3-4.
"Set me as a seal upon you heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it." Song of Solomon 8:6-7
Don't let your heart lead you. lead your heart.
Dare: "Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he or she would love to do or a project they'd really like to work on. Just be together."
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