Dare #10 - Love is unconditional

"God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us" Romans 5:8.  this is the foundation for us to build on in our quest to loving unconditionally. personally, i don't think i am capable of unconditional love without Jesus and the cross as my example. i think once we ever start to take our eyes off the cross, we start to shift them onto ourselves. the Gospel should be infused into the air we breathe, the songs we sing, the tasks we take on, and so on and so forth! we can go about these dares, and we can do them diligently. but, i don't think it means what it's supposed to mean without the Cross in the center. i follow Pastor Tullian, a pastor in Fort Lauderdale, FL on twitter, and he talks a lot about this. he states, "'Doing' will become instinctive and spontaneous only when our hearts become deeply gripped by what's been done!"

because Christ loves us so much that He would die for our sins, we must love others. "We love, because He first loved us." I John 4:19

i am so grateful that God doesn't force me to prove my love to Him. oh how i would fail miserably. in the same exact sense, we should never expect our spouse or loved ones to prove their love to us. yet, so often, that's exactly where the basis of our love lies. right now, it doesn't matter what your spouse has done to you. we've all been wronged, and yes i know some have been wronged at a greater degree than others, but we have to focus on loving, despite how we are treated. this is a hard one for me. i very much want to feel loved. i want my spouse to show me his love. but, my love cannot be based on how he treats me, whether it is good or bad. and who knows, maybe when we focus on ourselves, we will start to see more of what we want from our spouses, although that is not the ultimate goal. when you get tempted to base your love off what your spouse is or isn't doing for you, think of how we treat Christ after all He has done for us. sometimes we all need a little perspective.

remember, we cannot attain unconditional love by just "doing" it. the book states, "You will struggle and fail to attain this kind of marriage unless you allow God to begin growing His love within you. Love that 'bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things' does not come from within. It can only come from God" (page 48).

Dare:  Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse--something that proves (to you and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. Wash her car. Clean the kitchen. Buy his favorite dessert. Fold the laundry. Demonstrate love to them for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage."